Shabbat Shalom. My name is Gabrielle Xilas and I am a senior at Walter Payton College Prep. I will be attending The University of Michigan in the fall. The last time I was here on this bimah delivering a D’var Torah on a Shabbat morning, it was for my Bat Mitzvah almost 5 years ago on June 12, 2010. On that morning I was one shacharit prayer away from fainting on the stage, so let’s hope this D’var goes a little smoother than that. In this week’s portion, K’doshim, God gives the Jewish people a list of things they must do in order for them to be holy in His eyes. As some of you already know today’s Shabbat service is honoring all of Anshe Emet’s high school seniors going off to college next year. And so, this week’s Torah portion, K’doshim, acts as our “packing list” of what Jewish values and ideas we need to bring with us on our journeys next year and beyond.
To start off, we really are all who we are today thanks to our parents. Our success in life is due to their nurturing, lessons taught, and sometimes overbearing involvement in our lives. The very first thing on God’s list of what we must do to be holy, in Leviticus Chapter 19, verse 3 is: “Every person shall revere their mother and father.” The fact that this commandment opens the chapter is not at all arbitrary; respecting our parents is the most important thing we can do. For many of us, next year will be the longest time we will be apart from our parents. Regardless of the physical distance, their influence on us will remain. I am going to sound like my mother when I say this, but it is vital that we check in every so often to let them know that we are making good choices, and that we continue to make them proud. It’s the least we can do.
In life, we have the choice whether to help others or not. Core to God’s list of how to be holy is the importance of consistently choosing to help others. Leviticus 19:14 says: “You shall not insult the deaf, or place a stumbling block before the blind.” It can be tempting to take advantage of other people’s weaknesses, and exploit them to make yourself better off. Not only is that a selfish thing to do to someone else, but hurting others also hurts yourself. In life there are two versions of success. There is success through cheating, manipulation, and disrespect, and there is the second version of success which is a whole lot sweeter where you get somewhere honestly and can take full credit for earning it the right way. All of the seniors sitting in this sanctuary are very familiar with this second version of success, as we all have achieved our goals of getting into amazing schools as a result of a lot of hard work and being committed to helping others through our involvement and commitment at Anshe Emet for all these years. It is really self- punishment to not allow yourself to feel that pure joy that comes with true success by taking advantage of others to succeed. Next year, those temptations are going to arise, but I am confident in all my peers, that we will rise above, and follow our strong Jewish values which teaches us otherwise.
Speaking of manipulation and temptation, I had the opportunity this year to get my real first taste in politics, and fortunately my experience was not filled with either of these things. I, and my good friends Meredith Leon, Emma Siegel and Bryson Shelist, were lucky enough to travel to Washington DC with Rabbi Russo for the AIPAC Schusterman Advocacy Institute High School Summit. We got to sit down in the office of Congressman Danny Davis and discuss the importance of Iran not gaining nuclear power. I wish I could tell you that our chat resolved that very complicated and controversial issue, but as we all know, the talks and negotiations between Iran and the US continue. However, as we walked through Davis’ office, I did take notice of all his Israel themed paraphernalia that he had displayed. While the district he represents isn’t very Jewish, he made a point to tell us that it was people like us who reinforced his love and support for Israel and all it stood for. He reminded me how honesty and respect is just as successful a way of achieving ones goals than manipulation and cheating. Rather than putting stumbling blocks before those who are vulnerable, we can reach the “finish line” simply by speaking our truths, about Israel and our values for example, plainly and honestly.
I also sort of had an epiphany at that moment which was, whether we realize it or not, we are all representatives of the Jewish community, and how we act shapes how others consider that community. It is extremely important that we all keep that in mind as we venture off into our brand new college communities where Judaism may not be as accepted as it is in our current communities. Perhaps on our packing list of values, we need to include a sense of pride and awareness in how our behavior and our choices will reflect on the wider Jewish community.
When the sage Hillel was asked to summarize the Torah in one sentence he turned to this week’s Torah portion and said “What is distasteful to you, don’t do to another person.” “Love thy neighbor as thyself” is found in Leviticus 19:16. That value is also one of the first things you learn in Hebrew School at the Synagogue, or at The Bernard Zell Anshe Emet Day School. I was fortunate enough to attend BZAEDS for 10 years from junior kindergarten through 8th grade. And now that I am involved as a madricha in the Religious School, every Sunday I get to be reminded of all of the things I learned in my decade at BZAEDS. As a Madricha for first graders, I believe that by far the most important things they learn are the Jewish values that can be taken with them from the stories they hear in the Torah. Next year, we are all going to be living in very different much more diverse communities than we are a part of now. The number one rule we must follow is to be respectful of other people’s differences, and give them the same respect that we expect from them. In other words, “Love thy neighbor as thyself.”
Welcoming strangers into our community is something that makes the Jewish community so special. Leviticus 19:34 adds this value of welcoming the stranger to our packing list: “The stranger that journeys among you shall be unto you as the home-born, you shall love him as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt.” My dad, Peter Xilas, isn’t Jewish. However, before I was born, he and my mom decided that their kids were going to be raised Jewish, and that is exactly what they have done. My dad has been welcomed into the Anshe Emet community with open arms, and had that not been the case, I would not be able to stand before you today as a young woman with all of the Jewish values that are now such a huge part of my identity.
Another time, I felt the power of being welcomed in my own life here at Anshe Emet was in the fall of last year when Aaron Fogelson came up to me in AP Biology class and told me that I “absolutely had to go to USY Lounge Night on Tuesday.” I was a little nervous to go because I thought I was a bit too late to the party, and that people would be unwelcoming. The second I walked in I realized that that would not be the case, and that SHMUSY was a group I was meant to be a part of. Coming to SHMUSY gave me a time to reconnect with my Jewish peers and at the same time allowed me to stay connected to the larger Jewish community. Since I know how good it feels to be welcomed I have no doubt that I will continue my involvement in these types of groups and organizations in the years to come. “Welcoming the stranger” is a value I hope we all take with us on our journey.
In K’doshim, God says that if someone is going down the wrong path and making incorrect choices, it is our job to show them the right way and get them back on the right track. Literally the parshah says, in 19:17 “You shall rebuke your neighbor.” Many, anti Israel movements, amongst them BDS campaigns, are gaining popularity on more and more college campuses every day. . It is our responsibility as Jewish students on campus to stand up for our beliefs, and defend the honor of the state of Israel by teaching the truth. Sometimes, we will have to rebuke our neighbors.
However, it is emphasized in the Torah that this must be done in a respectful manner that doesn’t belittle the person or bring them embarrassment. Rather, God tells the Jewish people, we must do so in a manner that reflects positively on the State, on the Jewish people, and on our own dignity and integrity.
It is truly my honor to accept the Rabbi Seymour Cohen Award for Youth Leadership on behalf of this senior class, and I am so beyond thankful to have had my experiences at BZAEDS, teaching at the religious school, reading Torah at Rosh Hashana services for the past 4 years, being a part of SHMUSY, going to an AIPAC convention, and being raised in a loving Jewish household.
For all of those amazing reasons I would like to thank my parents, the Anshe Emet clergy, my teachers at BZAEDS, and all of my friends who I have gotten to share these experiences and memories with.
At our Bar and Bat Mitzvahs we “officially” became adults within the Jewish community, however now we are adults in the real sense of the word because we are about to go off on our own for the journey of our lives.
I am speaking for all of the Seniors, when I say that the lessons we have been taught through our Jewish education and experiences, the same ones spelled out for us in K’doshim (honoring our parents, not placing stumbling blocks, loving our neighbors as ourselves, welcoming the stranger, and speaking Truth to those who are straying from the right path), have prepared us to move out into other communities and to be the best versions of ourselves and represent the Jewish community the best way we know how.
Shabbat Shalom,
Gabrielle Xilas